Tuesday Humor

One of my favorite fast foods is a Whopper. However, I rarely go to Burger King because the service is so poor. I feel as if I need to thank the order taker for bothering to take my order. Then I pray they get it right. I found this skit on YouTube.

Here’s to you Mr. Hair Salon Bikini Wax Technician.

As promised in yesterday's article, I found a copy. Several years ago, I proposed this as part of the Bud Light Real Men of Genius ads.

Here’s to you Mr. Hair Salon Bikini Wax Technician.

You’re the envy of all straight men.

You see more different trim in day than most men see in a lifetime.

{Background guy: He is so damned lucky }

It’s baffling as to why women who insist on having sex in the dark would spread themselves in front of you Mr. Bikini Wax Technician.

{Background guy: You can touch, just don't penetrate}

Men all over wonder why one pulled pubic hair can put the skids on intercourse, but you get to pull all of her pubic hairs with not so much a scream.

{Background guy: I know if she is a true blond}

Your motto is “crop it straight” as no hair should be left to peak as she flaunts her stuff on the beach.

{Background guy:She can spread those legs on the beach towel}

Not every man gets to spread hot gooey liquid on the crotches of 32 different women each day, so this Bud’s for you Mr. Bikini Wax Technician.

{Background guy: He's talking about wax}

By OWO
January 16, 2004

America's Beer Falls Victim to the Global Economy

I guess most of you have heard the big news in business this week, Anheuser-Busch has been purchased by InBev, a Belgium beer giant. Yep, America's #1 beer, Budweiser, is now owned by a foreign brewery. On hearing the news I must say I was pissed. Why hasn't President Bush and Congress stepped up to stop this non-sense? Foreigners brewing our Budweiser is worse than when the company which managed all of our ports was going to be sold to terrorist. I was going to show their butts and stop drinking my Bud Lites and those new BL Limes my brother in law just got me hooked on. I wasn't sure whether I would switch to Coors or Miller, but one thing I knew was that the Mockler family could kiss their revenues of my 12 pack every few weeks good-bye. I am also in a dilemma as whether or not to delete the 80 versions of Bud Lite's Real Men of Genius radio ads on my Ipod.

Then I did some research. I found out Budweiser was just another beer until they got into aggressive marketing. In the old days they would pay for a bar's liquor license if they sold Budweiser on tap. In the 1950's, they were the first to market their product by sponsoring prime time shows like the Jackie Gleason Show. They even payed Frank Sinatra $750,000 to sponsor his TV show. Then beginning in the 70's, they aggressively entered the sports arena's. That is said to have taken them to the top.

According to an article on Salon.com by Edward McClellend, Budweiser originally was not that good of a beer when compared to others.

"Adolphus Busch, the dynasty's founder, called his beer 'dot schlop' and drank wine instead. During taste tests, St. Louis drinkers spat it back over the bar. But if the Busches didn't believe in their product, they believed in their business plan."

This aggressive marketing put a number of small American beer companies out of business or if they were lucky forced them to sell to Budweiser or rivals Miller and Coors.

Maybe I should not be so upset. I must have become caught up in the marketing as I grew older because I recall it was Miller Pony's and Schlitz Malt Liquor that got through the stress of 11th grade math. Also, I just realized I now mostly drink imported red wine. I prefer Chianti (Italian) Crianza (Spanish) red and if I am broke, Yellow Tail (Australian). I reallly don't care that much for American wines.

Furthermore, I wrote a version of Real Men of Genius, but Budweiser did not accept it. Now I really don't care about the sale of America's beer.

PS - If I can dig up a copy of Mr. Bikini Wax Technician, I will post it so you can decide if it should have been turned into a radio spot. Perhaps I should resubmit it to InBev.